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Here’s the real deal on happiness

We routinely expect so much of ourselves. Resilience, doing what it takes, doing the ‘right thing’. But here’s the deal: if you treat yourself like a circus animal,

 

 

 

 

 

then one day you will find this happens:

– your motivation gives way; or you get ill; or some other personal crisis arises. So what’s my take on this?  (I have been dealing with this for some 20 years.)

Just to be clear, I am not only talking about work; this applies equally to family life and relationships.

 

1.  What you THINK will make you happy, and what will, are two completely different places. Pretty much nailed on guaranteed. 
Daniel Gilbert gives a convincing demonstration in his book Stumbling on Happiness.

2.  Happy people create happy and fulfilled lives – NOT the other way around.
This is widely accepted now. Even in business schools.

3.  Don’t PURSUE happiness; USE it
Because it’s not a THING out there, it’s an inside job. This is from my own research; the Physics of Happiness.

4.  Happiness is not the point of life – it’s a pointer in life
The Physics of Happiness

5.  Happiness starts with a DECISION. Will you make happiness important in your life? 

Have you any idea how common it is to have motivators in life like pride, recognition, admiration, security, love …  Yet did you know that these will  undermine even your best efforts to hold onto them?

What if you could overhaul your mental clockwork and get it ticking to its natural rhythm?  ‘Lining up your ducks’ so that you can effortlessly achieve and sustain what matters to you, AND have happiness at the same time? Really to have your cake and eat it?  That’s what I specialise in.

Links:
1. The Surprising Science of Happiness. Daniel Gilbert.

2. ‘Being your Natural Weird Self’.  Daniel Cable. (2018). https://bit.ly/2NHyqsi

3. In Your Element.  https://www.ted.com/talks/ken_robinson_how_to_escape_education_s_death_valley

4. Creativity / Eat Sleep Work Repeat. Bob Daisley Vice President of Twitter.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=njeSTq7VxaABruce Dais

About

I’ve always been driven to ask ‘why?’ and ‘how?’ ever since childhood. Drove my Mum crazy at times.  So it was entirely consistent that I studied Physics at degree and Masters level, and that my first job was exploring the ground beneath our feet in oil and coal exploration.  Next I studied the space above our heads with atmospheric physics; and then the spaces we inhabit (in buildings).  For the last 20 years I have specialised in exploring the space inside our heads, studying Hypnotherapy and Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP). and seeing therapy clients.

The Physics of Happiness evolved from working with clients and noticing how there was always a back story to their current problems, and a future too. The background kind of explains the ‘why me?’ and ‘how did this happen?’, and the future part provides the ‘pull’ to sustain the result of the work with them.

I decided to put my ideas to the test, and to develop and research them more fully as a PhD dissertation. The topics I researched included philosophy, spirituality, religion, psychology, neurobiology, and even cosmology and the emerging new physics.

The Physics of Happiness does more than deal with the emotion of happiness. In addition to helping understand our personal problems, it also provides a framework for understanding the things that are happening to us and around us.  Because we are prone to view the world through he rearview mirror, and cannot grasp  what we have never before known, it is almost impossible for us to detect evolution in action.  The Physics of Happiness helps us to see the evolutionary process at work on the many different scales – individual, society, culture, and humanity itself.  

Blog

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Why should you look again at Happiness?

Why should you look again at Happiness? Because Happiness is not what you might think. Here’s an Audio version:  https://www.dropbox.com/s/byx0ynr0p8qdlzw/Happiness_1_It_Changes.mp3?dl=0 Or if you prefer, this is the text transcribed from the audio:  I actually did a PhD dissertation in happiness a few years back, and while I’m a physicist by education, I’ve been a hypnotherapist …

Continue reading “Why should you look again at Happiness?”

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A New Take on Happiness

A New Take on Happiness ‘Happiness is no laughing matter.’ Bishop of Dublin, nineteenth century CE ‘The one thing people want most in life, is the one thing they know nothing about.’  Michael Fordyce, the original happiness researcher of modern times.  Everyone knows what happiness is, don’t they?  Surely there are more important things to worry …

Continue reading “A New Take on Happiness”

Services

I will happily show you how you can USE happiness in your life – and what’s likely to happen if you don’t.

I’ll quite probably offer to do that for nothing more than the price of a few coffees. If you would like me to overhaul your mental clockwork to get it ticking to your true natural rhythm, you ‘authentic self’, then I’ll propose a short program of work together, over three sessions.

After that, we keep in touch to see how you are getting along, It’s a good idea to set up a small coaching support plan, where you can draw on my expertise in mindwork to nail the details and specifics as they come up, to get the whole thing nailed on.  Happiness, motivation, fulfilment. And it’s not just for the workplace; no. Family life and relationships are equally in the frame.

Contact

My main consulting room is at 23 The Foresters, Burgundy House, Bowers Parade, Harpenden AL5 2FB.

Also in London at 58 South Molton Street, Mayfair.

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